I was born at an early age some stuff happened between then and now.
I was always a troubled child, but was very creative and inquisitive. My mood swings were always put down to temper tantrums, but it was all part of depression.
I was diagnosed with Rapid Cycle Bipolar Disorder in late 2011. I also have PTSD, and a borderline personality disorder.
I have coping mechanisms that enable me to manage my life, but sometimes, as with everyone’s life, things DO go wrong. But with support I’m still here.
I started to blog about my mental illness in the hope that it would explain what it is like to suffer with depression and all that it entails. I blog with honesty and with a wry sense of humour wherever possible, but always with sensitivity (I hope).
I have written about my personal experiences regarding depression, PTSD and flashbacks, abuse and self harm. Some of my writing can be emotive, it can be amusing and it can even lose its way, but it is always honest.
In my time, I have fought adversity and refused to let my mental illness hold me back. I was a serving police officer and have lived a full and varied life. Being mentally ill has given me an empathy for others. I can understand how a person feels and have an idea of what they are going through.
There is, and always has been, a stigma regarding mental illness, but that stigma is slowly being broken down as people are becoming more and more open and honest about their illnesses.
The main aim of my ramblings is to hopefully educate others and help to break down that stigma that surrounds mental illness.
My rock in a hard place (and some pebbles too…)
I am, in some ways, a lucky man.
I am not blessed with the perfect body, or good looks. I am over weight (or, under tall…) and I wear glasses due to being short-sighted and having a slightly lazy eye. My teeth are crooked from years of rugby, martial arts, working the door and walking the beat. I have a stammer that comes out when I get tired or stressed. I have unruly hair that no matter how much hair product I apply to it, the tuft at the back WILL stick up as will the cowslick at the front.
Anyway… Moving on… So why do I feel that I am lucky?
Well, as you know if you’re a regular reader of this blog (and if you are, there is help out there for you…) I live with my mental illness and i have come to accept it. I may not like it all the time, but I cope with it. Mostly…
I use social media in the form of Twitter and hopefully I have tweeted some useful, insightful or just plain amusing tweets or something that someone has found comforting. I hope so. And the people who follow me and those that I follow on Twitter are amazing to. They’re very supportive and extremely helpful, because without them, this blog would be nothing… read more